An Ode to My First Mentor
Dear Roger,
Most people may think the most successful mentors are the mentors who are the most successful. But you taught me it was never about how successful a person gained that made them a successful mentor, all that was needed was to be honest, open, and willing.
I was a young teenager, about 13 turning 14 when my dad offered me on a silver platter the opportunity to set up my own dark room. Back in the days before digital photography, having a dark room for printing was rare for most photographers. Many would convert their bath tubs into a space to hold the chemical filled trays with makeshift black out curtains over windows and temporarily screwing in a red light bulb in a mirrored vanity. I had the boiler room, a mostly dedicated space that I could set up my dark room and leave it up without having to take it down for a shower. The only other space I shared in that room was with an extra, rarely used refrigerator. I got black out fabric made to cover the curtains, doors, a folding table that held my enlarger and chemical trays along with a single red light bulb that was a permanent fixture. I inherited a canon EOS-1 35mm from my parents.
I had all the resources, but none of the guidance until you started giving your time after your work day to support me.
You had no children, and so your parenting skills weren’t tested but you put up with my teenage agitation quite well. You recounted stories from being on location to me often and prepared me as best you could for what real filmmaking was like. My privileged studio upbringings couldn’t imagine a world with dingy motels and long overnights in the pouring rain. But you said just wait, that was real filmmaking.
You were patient, very patient with me and I enjoyed the field trips to other exhibitions you encouraged me to take. Whenever you reviewed my work you were very honest, even if it wasn’t something I was ready to hear and even at that sensitive time caused me to tear up. You knew I still needed to hear it, and you did the best you could to make me listen.
I listened Roger. The biggest criticism you kindly delivered to me stuck with me —
You take good photographs, but they’re all of teenage girls. You need to get out there, find other things to photograph.
Saying this to a fourteen year old seemed a bit of a high demand at the time, but looking back on it it’s exactly what I needed when I didn’t know I needed it.
My dark room has been disassembled for decades now. I still have my enlarger stored away, and the lucky cat you gave me when I began my film production company. I’m grateful last year I was able to send you a copy of my first photography book, so you could see the impact the time you spent mentoring me made. I’m sorry I won’t be able to send you my next book.
